Accepting your disappointments Disappointments are the most uncomfortable feelings I have experienced thus far. The feelings we get from disappointments are multifaceted and unearth underlying emotions like rage, unhappiness, and possibly several others too delicate to detect. Although disappointments can be dealt with they can surely throw us off the cliff. The education ministry has announced it will release the Grade 10 and 12 higher level full-time and part-time results on December 21. I can imagine that this will be the most tense day for anybody expecting their results and unsure of how they fared. I believe most of the people will be disappointed about the results they get whether they fail or pass so maybe my column for this week will help you deal with your “disillusionment”.The first thing you would want to know about dealing with disappointment is to let yourself experience the disappointment… be with the feeling. Just be aware of your displeasure and “get over it”. So what you failed? So what you didn’t get the points you expected? If it happened there is nothing you can do about it, but don’t hide from your problems - just be in the present and allow yourself some time to get used to the moment and move on. We’ve all heard of learners who have tried to commit suicide after getting their results but I believe such occurrences can be dealt with if only we knew how to deal with disappointment. Sure our parents and guardians are strict and we do not want to let them down but still no amount of disappointment should result in somebody trying to harm themselves over exam results.
With that said, after you’ve had your experience with your frustration over your results or any issue you are dealing with, it is time to get another viewpoint. Get another perspective! The awesome thing about getting over any kind of stressful situation you’ve already told yourself how to overcome it. You have said to yourself “I know I can do better”. After you give yourself a chance to feel and accept your situation you are able to move on. A broader perspective gives you a means on how to move forward and how you plan on plotting your next move.
Throughout any disappointing situation you should know yourself and never lose sight of your goals. For example I know that I should always expect the unexpected no matter how I feel about anything. Things tends to change, such is life. This has always prepared me to deal with issues that are not within my control. If and when I deal with any issue that does not benefit myself, I know that I can overcome it because I know that I have goals set out for myself and even if I fail at times I’ll know that I will have to achieve those goals. Knowing yourself and your core gives you the freedom of choice. You can choose to be driven by what happens to you, or you can choose to live in line with your principles.
Above anything else you should know that disappointments are only temporary. It’s a cliché but you should know that disappointments are not bound to last. You need to know that you did something and it did not work out, learn from your experience and keep moving forward. All of your disappointing experiences provide you with valuable lessons you can use to help improve your chances of success the next time around. You are not perfect and should accept that you will need to make progressive improvements over time even in the face of disappointments
Until next time… Peri nawa!!
SHONA NGAVA
shona@namibiansun.com